Friday, October 28, 2005

Settle down, Spaz

I've got to say that I am, at times, a bit of a teleholic and there are some TV programs that I try not to miss because they are so well produced.  I've seen a lot of TV during my life time - yeah, I'm quite proud about that because it keeps me up-to-date with current affairs and whatnot - and although there's (obviously) been a lot of change in the style and making of programs, the one thing that I've notice is the general tolerance of bad language on television.

I suppose it's because I try not to swear too much, especially at home (although you can catch me doing so under my breath), but I won't say that I don't because it's quite cathartic.  Anyway, I'm sure that 'crap' used to be quite a bad word when I was a young teenager, and 'fuck' was even worse (I'm sure this word got many films an 18-rating back then).

But now, 'crap' is okay around 6pm because it's in The Simpsons, 'fuck' after 9pm (oi, stop it!) and in 15-rated films (at least, I remember hearing it a few times before), and 'cunt' (apologies, I don't like the word either but it's for sake of example) is quite freely used in 18-rating films.  Now don't get me wrong, a bit of bad language is okay and probably builds character (and teaches kids bad words), and I'm not against it unless it's totally out of place (that is, more wrong-time-of-day-and-audience rather than overuse of).

It's just that foul language is becoming more tolerable in this modern society and whether it's a good or bad thing, well, it's not for me to say.  Personally, I don't mind it so long as the context is relevant, because I feel that expletives are just a strong way of expressing one's feelings - it shows that person's instantaneous emotional reaction to a situation.

Oh and 'spaz' is a word that isn't used enough - I know, I know, it's un-PC but the way it can be integrated so seemlessly into sentences is amazing - sometimes I think it's a special (no pun intended) talent to utilise it properly.  Family Guy, season 3, the episode where the FBI come in and take over the house - that's where the post title comes from - that made me laugh for longer than it really should have.

And why is bad language becoming more tolerable in our modern society?  I don't remember any particular point in my life when someone important said "Right, well, I've had enough of this taboo subject. Fuck it all."  But maybe that's just it, the number of taboo subjects back in the day was immense but now they've become more topical, and the world has become more colloquial.

To be honest, I don't know if anything is taboo anymore.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Someone send him to the ER

I see Robbie 'Smug Bastard' Williams has a new album out, Intensive Care.  I bloody well wish he was there himself - tosser.  But, you see, it's not that he's personally done anything to make me feel this way - it's just that he's a bit of a twat sometimes.

Like Jamie 'Fat Lips and Tongue' Oliver - he was a bit of a wanker too, especially in the early days.  But he's managed to climb up my list, and it was actually good fun watching him start up a restaurant with trainee kids - maybe it was the fact that he was sufferring quite badly.  Me thinks he's actually kinda okay now.

Random ranting, really - nothing much else.

Monday, October 24, 2005

Round and round and round we go

I've got a taste for travelling now - a real thirst for going out there and away from the 'same ol' same' - since going on that expidition round England.  Yes I know, travelling around England doesn't exactly sound that exciting but it was, if nothing else, very interesting.  I kept telling people that I've never travelled England even though I've lived here for 23-yrs, so I thought I'd put an end to it (although my geography of our island hasn't improved all that much).

I'm still envious about those that travel the world (namely Caroline or my brother), but still, going places near home can be as fun.  So following up on my and Nav's England travels, we have both decided that Round Ireland (2006) will go ahead some time next year.  Hopefully, I'll be employed and have some readies coming in (Layer Cake has some of the best London colloquial terms) and then take a huge slice of holiday time off for my Irish travels.

Furthermore, we've also talked about travelling Round London and possibly using another Morton book.  For me, this will be an on-going thing, as I've started to investigate London town a lot more recently and finding the diversity of it all quite, quite appealing.

So it looks like this could be the start of my own 'Round...' series.  If funds increase, I could well take it abroad, but for the time being I'd like to think of it as my own Michael Palin-esque travel adventures.


Feel free to post comments of places for me to visit, be it England, Ireland or London:
  • Round England 2005
  • - downloadable pdf of blog for offline reading

  • Round Ireland 2006


  • Round London
  • Sunday, October 23, 2005

    Fun fun fun!!!

    It was a pretty active week just gone, which means that I probably won't be doing much else for a while now.  Since the last time I spoke to you guys, Nav came up to London on Wednesday to stay for a couple of nights before his conference/presentation in Regent's Park area.  Thursday saw us head to Cutty Sark/Greenwich Park area to have a look at the University of Greenwich, Camera Obscura, Maritime Museum and Oxford Street/Regent Street.

    Having seen the Obscura at Bristol, I was excited to visit the one in London as many people have said that its skyline is something to marvel at.  My brother had been before and said it to be a good view, but when we got there it didn't seem as impressive as that in Bristol.  Firstly, the magnified view was in a set direction with no means to closely examine any other part of London.  Secondly, the magnified view itself was too magnified - at least, more so than the Bristol Obscura.  I was a disappointment honestly, but luckily we didn't have to pay to look - mind, the view from the Observatory hill was very nice although it was busy at the lunch hour we attended.  And we stood on the GMT line - all very (un)exciting...

    Thursday night saw Nav hold his head in his hands as he got a call from his work colleague apologising for leaving their presentation posters on the Southampton-Waterloo train!  It was too late to get run prints in a local shop, although on Friday morning we found that it wasn't possible anyway.  So Nav headed into London with nothing but his laptop and a Powerpoint presentation - however, it turns out that his colleague managed to print B&W A1s in time for their presentations (although the entire event was .

    Friday afternoon (after getting a call for my first job interview - yay!), I eagerly headed down to Southampton to visit friends.  Everytime I trek there, it's always pleasant and fun - it's a different feeling visiting friends and places when you don't live there (even though I was there for four years).  I thought that I'd make the effort to get there that day as Max was too - didn't want to let him have all the fun.  Meet-up with the usual crew, and managed to get Tom to come along for the night (nice to see him after more than a year), and Friday night was seen away in Clowns followed by Jesters... ah dear, naked young 'uns dancing around being idiots - luckily my vision was blurring so as not to have my attention drawn to them (the short glimpse of a bloke's naked back was enough).  More drinking and OAP-dancing and soon 2am was upon us, so it was time to depart.  Suk's lounge sofa was pretty comfy, even more so after a few drinks and heavy head.

    Next morning, after de-smellifying myself, I got my usual tingly face and hands syndrome from drinking to a jovial state and probably from having only 5-and-half-hour deep sleep (which was enough, mind).  A hugely fatty fry-up, a walk around the Common to burn it off, and then finding an ice-cream van to put it all back on instantly.  Kieran left with other arrangements and Caroline (whom many hadn't seen in a long long while but still as smiley-cheery as ever), found Suk, Max, Ian and I at the Gordon's Arms in a deteriorating state towards zombification.  I still had my tingliness which didn't seem ready to recede yet (probably until I started drinking again).  We all met up in the late afternoon - after Ian painted his pig (not a euphemism... surprisingly) and Caroline had seen to other things - for curry, beers and more beers in a pub.  It's always nice to catch up on things and discuss things in an adult manner (basically slagging off the young 'uns who choose Degree in Surfing - I mean, wtf?! - and other such pointless degrees which flood the market and consequently lower the Degree status, rant rant rant...).  Oh and meet Polly a couple of short times over the weekend - my, she was her busy self, running from table to table chatting to friends - good ol' Polly.

    Another late night and short but heavy sleep, more tingling in the morning and practiced poaching eggs with Suk - me reckons we perfected it:
  • boil the 1-and-half to 2 inch-depth water and then down to a simmer;

  • stir the water slightly to make a vortexy-whirlpool effect;

  • crack in the egg (one at a time) from a low height;

  • let it cook (2-3mins to keep the yolk soft), take out with slotted spoon, and serve.


  • What not to do, which we did, was to poach the egg in fast moving boiling water because the eddy currents (ooh, how scientific!) will rip apart the egg white before it has a chance to solidify as one piece, leaving you with lots of flaky looking egg white part.  Looks a bit yucky, but well, expect toget it at least on the first poach.

    Lunch with Lucy and fiance Graham, Suk, Ian, Max and I - and then it was off back home after saying good-byes and see-you-soons.  The train journey was an arse though, 2-hours on the train Soton-Waterloo, and then another hour to home - some 45-mins to 1-hour longer than it should have taken.  It was, however, made up with me sitting diagonally opposite a rather cute-looking, mid-20s (me reckons), brunette.  puuurrrrrr.....

    Saturday, October 15, 2005

    Green London

    It's amazing what you can find in London if you just stop and look.  Yesterday was a day in London with Joanne, starting out in Regent's Park.  Now, I've lived so close to Central London that I've never actually bothered to have a decent walk around the place - it's kind of like "well, I'm right next to it so I can go anytime".  So it was nice to have a proper stroll around Regent's, which was quiet compared to Hyde Park.  I suspect that it's because it's not as accessible and is out-of-the-way from the main shopping districts.  Having got flapped at by pigeons, we decided not to invade their territory any longer and headed towards the riverside.

    It's always nice to have a chat with Jo, who usually asks things to get to know you that little bit better - so don't fret if you happen to meet her, she's just like that...

    We had a close inspection of the London Eye (only because we were right next to it) and found that they take pictures of people in the capsules when (and only when) they are in line with the axle.  Whether it's the first or second time you level the centre is not determined as it's up to those controlling the camera.  Something to remember when I go on the Eye.  Had coffee at Tate Modern and then walked further towards London Bridge to head towards Canary Wharf.

    Didn't get a proper look around but the Wharf certainly does seem impressive (first time I'd visited).  There're glass skyscrapers in all directions, yet there's a feeling of openness on level-ground in the area just outside of the station.  Beyond here, it opens out and you can see how concentrated the Wharf is once you get to the other side of the Thames.  We'd taken the DLR to Cutty Sark/Greenwich region in the hope that I could show Jo the 'camera obscura', (or here for contact details) but when we had actually found its location, it was too far to walk with the time we had left.  That's because we had a dinner booked at Cafe Rouge - which was lovely, to say the least.  French/British-style food.  Go and experience yourselves - a really friendly place with a nice atmosphere.

    And that was about it, really.  Time flew along pretty fast and it was all very enjoyable.  Made sure Jo got home okay, and then thought I'd better hurry along as I managed to catch the penultimate District/Cirle Line tube in order to set me towards Kings Cross.

    And then something happened on the train journey home (see below)...

    Like an orange water drinking fountain...

    On the train back home, something undoubtedly disgusting yet quite humourous happened.  Seeing it happen was disturbing, it's nothing to be proud of - in fact, it was a little worrying because what could happen as a consequence, but luckily there were her friends about to look after this unforutnate woman.

    It was comfortable on the 12:38am Kings Cross to Bedford Thamelink train yesterday - free seats and commuters half asleep from a night out or working late.  It was pleasant with the usual quiet atmosphere that comes with late night travelling.  A group of three friends were sitting in the next set of seats, with me having the vantage point (if you could say that) of being able to see the rather drunk woman as she plopped down into her seat and began to doze off.  One guy seemed pretty knackered to, which the other seemed okay.  Now, it wasn't exactly a rough ride on the train - just the usual amount of to-and-froing and up-down movement, but I suspect that anything like it could be uncomfortable when you're not feeling too good.  And, I think, the woman was unconsciously feeling a slight tummy upset (to say the least).

    I don't know if you want to read this rather graphic description, but what the hell.  It was serene and what happened next could never have been foreseen.  I was looking at the woman who had a dress that was decorated with fake spider web and spider, head tilted back slightly, silently sleeping.  Suddenly, and this is where one should consider this post's title for full effect, without any tell-tale signs the woman started to slowly gurgle out a steady stream of orange-coloured vomit.

    Now, it wasn't a slow dribbly gurgle, but if you imagine (and I'm sure you've seen it before) one of those water-fountains that you can press and water spouts up and out, except remember the ones where there wasn't enough force and the water folds/falls back on itself to make that gloopy, lumpy, bubbly water effect.  Now colour that orange (like fizzy Tango, if you will), add a bit more weight the the liquid, imagine a spout somewhat larger than a fountain (say, mouth sized), and... well... yeah, you kinda get the picture now.

    And it was like the water-fountain button was jammed for a couple of seconds, as it seemed to go on longer than it should have (maybe it was that folding/falling effect...) and flowed down onto her dress (presumably, I couldn't see).  Under-the-breath cries of "That's not right. That's just not right!" came from the male friend sitting next to the woman as he covered her up from prying eyes of those who may have seen the consequence of too much drink.  The other male friend tried to stop himself laughing out loudly yet failed to keep the sniggering within him as it made its infectious way to the former friend who had a wide smile on his face.

    What happened next was astounding and so amazing that you wouldn't believe it unless you saw it yourself.  You do little things when you're asleep and you wouldn't know.  This woman, having spewed her evening's drinks, gently thumbed away any remanants of her liquidy innards off her chin, eye's still closed and not a frown on her face - in fact, there was a kind of calming smile from getting a bit of shut-eye.

    I tried not to join in, but when you see someone stiffling a laugh caused by someone else, it's hard not to have a smile on your face.

    Wednesday, October 12, 2005

    Dammit, no more!

    HTML editing is such a pain in the arse.  I've been faffing about to get rid of something on the individual post pages (unnecessary extra white box on sidebar menu, if you happen to have spotted it before) - and finally worked out what was wrong with the HTML code.  Took bleeding 2hrs to sort out and turned out to require moving only a couple lines of code - and only 2-lines away from where they originally stood.

    Bloofy that's it - no more... huff!

    Monday, October 10, 2005

    What a sad, sad day for clay models

    Yesterday, my sister and I went to VUE to watch 'Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit' - a true British comedy film it was too.  Lots of good jokes, nice and engaging storyline, and a great twist (which, for once, does not happen right at the end but some place in the middle).  The jokes run along nicely, even spread out, and there were some for the parents too (especially the warning label on a cardboard box that covers Wallace).  There were some touching moments too, and I laugh in the face of horror (films).  Great stuff, you must go see this.

    Anyway, I thought that I would talk about the film because I read in the news earlier today that the Aardman/Wallace and Gromit studios had been burned down - meaning that everything all the way back to Morph has been destroyed and lost.  All that history gone!  I couldn't believe it, it was a real shame - but I suppose they can be thankful that they had finished the film already.

    I suspect that some tabloid newspaper will report this disaster with the headlines: "Not A Close Shave", or some such crap.

    Let's hope that Nick Park can get things back to normal quickly so he can film some more W&G.

    Sunday, October 09, 2005

    I'll buy that for a dollar

    Couple of days back I was scanning through the free channels on our Sky box thingy and after getting through a load of crap and foreign stuff, I came across the many shopping channels that 'help' stereotype Sky TV.  The usual trash of fitness machines and ornamental tripe was on display, but one caught my attention - so much so that I watched it for 20-mins to its conclusion.

    The 'V Authentic Slicer' was on show and the guy exhibitioning the device made it look awesome and really sold it.  He was slicin' and dicin', chippin' and choppin', gratin' and shreddin' his way through all manner of vegetables that would require such verbs.nbsp; The speed at which he went through the vegetables was amazing and, boy, they looked perfect.nbsp; Usually, I'm not too concern with preparation and all that lark, but with the V Authentic Slicer, I see no reason why people wouldn't use the time saved on displaying their salads and sandwiches in an extremely appetising way - I know I would... possibly.

    There are some going on ebay.co.uk for about £16-20, which is a few bob less than retail price.

    Other than that, there was crap all on at 2am, so I decided to go to bed.

    Friday, October 07, 2005

    Damned if I don't, apparently...

    I was supposed to meet that friend yesterday, but she was a little busy and I was lazy.  Should have seen her off at Heathrow too, but she insisted that having a good chat on Messenger last night would clear things up - which it did, I think.  Big hug to you Farica - see you soon.

    A friend that I met at Southampton said that he didn't like saying 'good-byes' when departing from friends, instead using 'see you later'.  And I guess that's true really, because it's not as if I'll never see or contact them again.  I try to take that stance with such situations, because it feels better than closing things off completely.

    I'm still kicking myself.

    Damned if I do, and damned if I don't

    quite...

    Thursday, October 06, 2005

    Shortpacked meets Katamari Damacy

    Still been reading Shortpacked! (and so should you lot too) and me thinks the author/artist has been playing on his Playstation lately.

    For those of you who don't know, Katamari Damacy is a game that involves you rolling a ball over objects to pick them up and score points.

    Shortpacked meets Katamari Damacy : strip 1
    Shortpacked meets Katamari Damacy : strip 2

    More to come, no doubt.

    Lo-and-behold! A job offer...

    except it's not as exciting as it sounds.  Yesterday, whilst out with friends in London, I got a call from a recruitment company (as I have been forced to place my CV onto job boards now... sulk) and they asked whether I would be interested in working as a member of their recruitment personel.  Now, don't get me wrong because a job is a job, and honestly, it was exciting to have been considered for a job so swiftly (I had posted my info only 4 days previous).  But to be offered a recruitment job to vet other engineering student CVs isn't exactly what I had in mind when wanting to flex my Mechanical Engineering knowledge.

    They've got to phone my up today to sort things out properly as it was too noisy to talk out on the streets of Chinatown.  I think I'll tell them to stuff it (but in a more polite fashion) - there's no prospects in the job, I feel.

    Now, I've just got to wait and meet a friend to sort out an incident that happened yesterday night.  Boy, it wasn't pleasant - heads will roll...

    Tuesday, October 04, 2005

    I knew thee well...

    Farewell to Ronnie Barker, aged 76, a true British comedian.

    quote: "He was much loved and admired for his appearances in the long-running series The Two Ronnies, with Ronnie Corbett, as prison inmate Fletcher, in the series Porridge, and as Arkwright, the bumbling, stuttering, sex-obsessed shopkeeper in Open All Hours."

    Take care, Ronnie.

    Monday, October 03, 2005

    (to be sung) Jeeesus Christ, Suuuper...PSP

    I've been reading Eurogamer for a few weeks now and it's pretty damn good - I advise you to go have a look if you are interested in video-gaming news, mainly because it (seems) home-grown (i.e. British).  Anyway, they reported on Sony getting a slap on the wrist for their Italian adverts about their 10-years in the gaming industry (Yahoo news version here).  I whole-heartedlylaugh at Sony's face.  Like this:
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  In. Your. Face. Exclamation mark.

    Saturday, October 01, 2005

    Points of View

    But not with Anne "Annie" Robinson, nor Terry "Radio 2" Wogan, nor Eamonn "GMTV" Holmes.

    I bloody well hate spiders - I'm such a sissy - but I thought I'd have a gander at this 20-million year old spider, it being very much dead so can't scuttle along at high-speeds.  They don't seem to have evolved much during the years (in terms of shape), so obviously one of the better (want of a better word) 'made' living species known to man.

    Sony Playstation is 10-years old!  Happy Birthday, you game-destroying, scummy bastards!  Sorry, did that slip out?  Personally, I think that Sony have done good and made the games industry more popular among the mass consumers, but they haven't really done much to add to the creativity of gaming.  Sure there are some great games for the console, but there's nothing directly from the company of which has made me feel that I have to get a PS or PS2 (or even a PS3).  Sega have been and always will be a favourite of mine.
    What I won't deeny and agree with (having read the BBC report), is that the Playstation did indeed advance 3D technology compared to the Sega Saturn although that was said to be a 2D-biased platform.  The PS was quite capable of pushing polygons in its infancy and even more so in its latter years.  Well done on that front.

    This caught my eye due to the recent talks of it being unhealthy to mother a child late on in life (i.e. 40-years and up).  Except it wasn't what I expected and turns out to be a story about a woman giving birth to her daughter's baby, Annie.  So does that make the surrogate mother Annie's mum or grandmother, or both, or neither, or something else completely?  Like an alien monkey from Mars...

    Finally, because otherwise I'd go on forever about the news, is the decommissioning of IRA arms.  I'm sure it's to be a joyous news to all and one great leap for pease, but the news articles hits something that I hadn't even considered - people's knowledge of arms.  There is no way to get anyone to forget all the technical knowhow that they may have learnt over the decades.  I'm not one for history - although the BBC make good use of the internet to give you the relevant details in their special report sections - but here's the low-down on the IRA.  I should read this one at some point, but I've given the link to the first page as to how the IRA (formerly, Provisional IRA) were formed.  I'd like to believe that the N.I. troubles are associated only to those who fall into the categories of Catholic, Protestant, Loyalist or Republicans, but there will always to be 'civilian casualties of war'.  I worry because I've a Iraish friend who's living in Northern Ireland so it's not nice to think anything should happen to her.  Although now she's working in England, so I think past tense 'worried' is more appropriate now.

    Ooh... the problem with me a blogging is that it can take so long - even worse when I'm watching TV ('The Hand That Rocks The Cradle' was on - awesome film).  I'm so slow that new news comes up on the BBCi headlines (at this time of day/night too).  So, finally, no really, this time it's for real: minimum wage goes up to £5.05.  Hazzah! to those who can't quite be arsed to find a proper job or make an effort to advance themselves.  Ooh, how controversial!